Sometimes I think that my life could very well be on a soap opera or a talk show. Long story short, Dylan's Mom (My MIL) discovered (while my FIL) is in the hospital that he has been lying to her for 29 years of marriage. He was hiding cash and racking up bills. He even came to us in 2003 asking for money stating it was for RRSP's but now we found out that he had a different sort of problem...like 3 different chequeing accounts and several outstanding bills (Visas and Loans-yes that's plural as in more that one or two. I can't believe that he would do this to his wife! He even stated that he may need to work not telling her that he had problems as in not giving her the exact amount on his cheques and racking up the bills he had sent to another location (his handicapped brothers house). Dylan is feeling betrayed and hurt and I don't blame him. Dylan comments frequent that Mom should leave Dad but she doesn't have anything to her name...the house is even in his name only with 2 advances on it. Dylan's mom approached him in the hospital yesterday and she asked him if he believed that he was in a happy marriage for 29 years. He said no and had no expression the whole time they were talking. No crying, no apologies no nothing. I'm devastated... what kind of example is that for his children?
Went to the health unit the scale I use normally (except for the last entry) and I was 210.5 lbs yesterday (April 27).
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Monday, April 23, 2007
The going ons of recently...
Dylan's dad had a stroke this past tuesday. They are saying that maybe that he had one a week before. (which makes sense because that's when he started getting the symptoms of left sided numbness) He's still in the hospital.
On a brighter note, I went to my doctor on tuesday and I weighed myself and I'm now 209 1/2lbs! I can finally wear some clothes that I haven't been able to wear since before Rebekah was born. I'm so ecstatic!
On a brighter note, I went to my doctor on tuesday and I weighed myself and I'm now 209 1/2lbs! I can finally wear some clothes that I haven't been able to wear since before Rebekah was born. I'm so ecstatic!
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Disappointment-Again
The social worker for infant adoptions came today and basically it's not looking good. We don't want a special needs child and we also would like to have a child that is younger than Rebekah. Special needs basically means Fetal alcohol or drug effected children. We right now aren't quite ready for that just yet in our lives. I honestly don't know if I can handle it. I do know that they need a home so maybe I could come to grips with that soon.
Dylan and I haven't talked about anything just yet... we are both in serious thought right now. The social worker also suggested that we take additional courses and do research on Fetal alcohol or drug effected babies etc. She also had suggested that we maybe do RESPITE care for foster familes that take care of special needs children.
Are only other option is to go thru a Private Adoption agency...which Dylan refuses to do. He has a point...why should we pay for a child? It's just wrong. You don't buy a child. Another point he made was that we want strictly NO CONTACT with the birth family. We are the parents. The child when s/he is old enough and longs and desires to know and meet his/her birth parents we will help them out in all that we can but we are the child's parents and we don't want to confuse the child with mixed messages. Some private adoption agency want to to pay for counselling for the birth mother and to me that is just wrong. Why should we have to pay for that? The decision was up to her and she made the choices not us.
Are hands are tied at the moment and we are at another loss. Is this a sign from God that we are only to have one child? Our miracle child are real true miracle child. Our gift from God himself? I have to admit that since that meeting on Saturday, I have been slowly trying to come to grips with the fact that we are probably never going to have any more children (either natural or by adoption). Just my way of thinking that maybe we have to realize that what we want isn't what God wants.
Dylan and I haven't talked about anything just yet... we are both in serious thought right now. The social worker also suggested that we take additional courses and do research on Fetal alcohol or drug effected babies etc. She also had suggested that we maybe do RESPITE care for foster familes that take care of special needs children.
Are only other option is to go thru a Private Adoption agency...which Dylan refuses to do. He has a point...why should we pay for a child? It's just wrong. You don't buy a child. Another point he made was that we want strictly NO CONTACT with the birth family. We are the parents. The child when s/he is old enough and longs and desires to know and meet his/her birth parents we will help them out in all that we can but we are the child's parents and we don't want to confuse the child with mixed messages. Some private adoption agency want to to pay for counselling for the birth mother and to me that is just wrong. Why should we have to pay for that? The decision was up to her and she made the choices not us.
Are hands are tied at the moment and we are at another loss. Is this a sign from God that we are only to have one child? Our miracle child are real true miracle child. Our gift from God himself? I have to admit that since that meeting on Saturday, I have been slowly trying to come to grips with the fact that we are probably never going to have any more children (either natural or by adoption). Just my way of thinking that maybe we have to realize that what we want isn't what God wants.
Friday, April 13, 2007
Adoption Update
Dylan and I were sapposed to have a social worker come and visit us on the 19th of April but she has since called and asked if we could get together at our house this coming Saturday. I'm really nervous. I'm not sure why...I have nothing to hide. I think it's just the fact that we are taking another step in this whole adoption procedure.
I have to admit that I was nervous about adopting partially because my parents are not really for it. My parents are actually quite "old school" about it and of course they have never heard any good stories come out only the bad stories about how the kid resents his adoptive parents or is a rebel and turns to drugs or alcohol to get over his feelings etc, etc. Dylan's parents are ok with the idea. Dylan's dad was adopted so that makes their view point alot easier too. I, however, think that Dylan's dad (my FIL) deep down resents his birth parents for giving him up...although he will never admit to it.
I had a really excellant talk with my sister this past week about adoption too. My sister's friend, Denise and her hubby adopted 2 kids after they had 3 kids of their own. Denise has such a positive outlook on it and I'm glad that she is there as an example. Denise had said to my sister that we are all adopted by Jesus so that gave me a new perspective of the whole adoption issue. She had also said that she is helping only 2 of the many MANY children that don't have a home, an example of a family and someone to tuck them into bed and love them. That sure made me think in a positive way about adoption. Now I just have to think of explaining it to my parents...
Weigh in: 212lbs-April 11, 2007
I have to admit that I was nervous about adopting partially because my parents are not really for it. My parents are actually quite "old school" about it and of course they have never heard any good stories come out only the bad stories about how the kid resents his adoptive parents or is a rebel and turns to drugs or alcohol to get over his feelings etc, etc. Dylan's parents are ok with the idea. Dylan's dad was adopted so that makes their view point alot easier too. I, however, think that Dylan's dad (my FIL) deep down resents his birth parents for giving him up...although he will never admit to it.
I had a really excellant talk with my sister this past week about adoption too. My sister's friend, Denise and her hubby adopted 2 kids after they had 3 kids of their own. Denise has such a positive outlook on it and I'm glad that she is there as an example. Denise had said to my sister that we are all adopted by Jesus so that gave me a new perspective of the whole adoption issue. She had also said that she is helping only 2 of the many MANY children that don't have a home, an example of a family and someone to tuck them into bed and love them. That sure made me think in a positive way about adoption. Now I just have to think of explaining it to my parents...
Weigh in: 212lbs-April 11, 2007
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
The Obstacles in Life
I know that we all have different obstacles in life and I wanted to share mine. My name is Sarah and I've been married to my hubby Dylan for 6 years. We have together an adorable girl named Rebekah who is 22 months old.
Dylan and I have had our share of problems in life. We got married "young" to start a family. I was 20 when we got married and Dylan was 22. But God had other plans for us. We were told it was medically impossible for us to have children. Dylan had varicose veins in his scrotum that needed to be surgically removed and shortly after that they realized that my prolactin levels were elevated, so I was put on Bromocriptine. The fertility doctor and our family doctor kept telling us that we were young and that we still had time...blah blah blah...I don't care how old you are a person going thru this ordeal does NOT want to be hearing that.
After hearing that we thought that our next option was adoption. So we had a 3 hour class, 1 day a week for 6 weeks for parent prep in April 2004. We had done all the necessary steps to get this adoption running and then we had to wait for our home evaluation which apparently there was a shortage of these workers around here and thus the wait. We were still waiting when we realized that we were pregnant that fall. I was due with Rebekah in June, 2005! Our prayers were answered!
In January 2006, our world was rocked yet again. I had a miscarriage. I was 6 1/2 weeks pregnant and I was devastated. Friends of ours, who had a son 2 weeks before our daughter, was going to have another child a month before this last one should have been born. And since January 2006, nothing. Dylan's single sisters both could have children and have no problems with infertility. It tore my heart. We have decided that maybe we should try to adopt again. I this time around am a little nervous about it. What happens if Rebekah asks questions? I've also heard so many negative adoptions experiences and I'm quite upset by that too. What happens if that child that we adopt, turns its back on us and resents us and causes us more grief in the future? I am at a loss and not sure what to do on that issue any more.
Then there's the topic of weight loss. When I was married I weighed 145 lbs and when I realized I was first pregnant with Rebekah I was 205lbs. After having her and breastfeeding I managed to keep and get some weight off but after I quit breastfeeding I gained. BIG TIME. My heaviest that I was at after Rebekah has been 225 lbs(That was what I was at full term with her!) Currently, I am 213.5 lbs...(I hesitate to say that but I don't know you and I don't plan on posting pictures of me for awhile:)
So I hope that you will enjoy and maybe help me learn from my obstacles in life that have been placed before me.
Dylan and I have had our share of problems in life. We got married "young" to start a family. I was 20 when we got married and Dylan was 22. But God had other plans for us. We were told it was medically impossible for us to have children. Dylan had varicose veins in his scrotum that needed to be surgically removed and shortly after that they realized that my prolactin levels were elevated, so I was put on Bromocriptine. The fertility doctor and our family doctor kept telling us that we were young and that we still had time...blah blah blah...I don't care how old you are a person going thru this ordeal does NOT want to be hearing that.
After hearing that we thought that our next option was adoption. So we had a 3 hour class, 1 day a week for 6 weeks for parent prep in April 2004. We had done all the necessary steps to get this adoption running and then we had to wait for our home evaluation which apparently there was a shortage of these workers around here and thus the wait. We were still waiting when we realized that we were pregnant that fall. I was due with Rebekah in June, 2005! Our prayers were answered!
In January 2006, our world was rocked yet again. I had a miscarriage. I was 6 1/2 weeks pregnant and I was devastated. Friends of ours, who had a son 2 weeks before our daughter, was going to have another child a month before this last one should have been born. And since January 2006, nothing. Dylan's single sisters both could have children and have no problems with infertility. It tore my heart. We have decided that maybe we should try to adopt again. I this time around am a little nervous about it. What happens if Rebekah asks questions? I've also heard so many negative adoptions experiences and I'm quite upset by that too. What happens if that child that we adopt, turns its back on us and resents us and causes us more grief in the future? I am at a loss and not sure what to do on that issue any more.
Then there's the topic of weight loss. When I was married I weighed 145 lbs and when I realized I was first pregnant with Rebekah I was 205lbs. After having her and breastfeeding I managed to keep and get some weight off but after I quit breastfeeding I gained. BIG TIME. My heaviest that I was at after Rebekah has been 225 lbs(That was what I was at full term with her!) Currently, I am 213.5 lbs...(I hesitate to say that but I don't know you and I don't plan on posting pictures of me for awhile:)
So I hope that you will enjoy and maybe help me learn from my obstacles in life that have been placed before me.
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